"12:30 in the mornin'... i still can't sleep, thinkin' bout your beauty it makes me weak..."

i can't remember the name of the artist that sang that song. so anyways, if you didn't notice, imma keep using song lyrics for the titles. pretty much any song can be used for any situation... so yeaa. haha. today was my sister's graduation from the class...and i couldn't be prouder. she has finally experienced God in a way words cannot express. along with about 150 entirely NEW young and older women... from all over the place... vegas, portland, arizona, even the philippines! it was an amazing thing to see. so many people under the grace... it makes me miss my retreat class....2 years ago... as far as my life now, it's pretty smooth. it could be better, but that's just the way life is i guess... went out with all the officers wednesday and thursday. wednesday we went T.G.I. friday's for camille's 18th birdie. congrats. haha. there were like 30 of us there... i'd feel bad for the waitress, except for that damnn gratuity thing. she probably made $100 off of us. haha. friday we went to ESPN zone in downtown disney. came home at 1. my ninong/ godfather took me. i don'tcall him ninong, because it makes him feel old. haha. so i just call him kuya, or "older brother" (for you not-filipinos.)and he talked to me about an interesting subject. i hate to have to keep going back to this subject (as mariel pointed out...), but it was good. he told me about how he feels about his girlfriend, that he loves her, but every day, he gets more afraid.... afraid that she would start liking someone else... and that she might choose that other guy... and it's the worst feeling in the world. so he said. and that got me thinking... this kinda thing did happen to me before, sort of, but we were never really "together." and i think that was the one that hurt the most. i'm over all that already, but i still remember how that felt. and it sucked. it was crazy, hearing him open up like that...


ok next subject. i gave alina a "congrats on serving present." haha. it was cool seeing her again. and her smile... haha. it's whatever. all the other guys were bugging me about it.... lamee. thanks again, kuya ace, for covering me. haha. i owe you $5. it was worth it.

and the next subject... to the only 4 people following my blog on this damnn thing... school's only been over for about 2 weeks or so... but it feels like a hella long time. we gotta chill sometime. maybe a party? danica, you still owe me one, remember?? haha. =] wesley, the second lame after school kid (after me). we'll hang sometime. haha. as soon as you can legally drive people. you know what? forget that. i'll trust my 14 year old sister behind the wheel before you. because i know the only way i'm getting out of the car you're driving, is on a stretcher. haha. jkjk. mariel, we need to hang too. haha. maybe i'll see you in english and anatomy. hopefully. haha. and michelle, last but not least, we'll double sometime. you'll take ken, obviously. haha.

"baby, you mah errthang, you all i ever wanted..."

damnn song is stuck in my head. haha. so it's 1 AM, and i got NOTHING to do. damnn. i never thought i've kinda MISS school...at least, the people there. school is still lamee. haha. i took my grandpa to cheesecake factory for father's day... hope he had fun. i call him "lolo" for more than 2 reason. yeah, "lolo" means grandpa in tagalog, but still, he's more than a grandpa to me. he's like my idol. i look up to him, especially because of his spiritual strength and faith. If you're reading this, then please don't mention this to anyone... but anyways, our family's not as... tight knit as other families. i mean, we all still love each other a lot, it's just that we're not as close. but even though we don't see each other a lot, he still prays that we would stay together. his faith and trust in GOD is something extremely admirable... a loyal servant of God. He would tell me all these stories about his past... and me, being the only grandson, would listen to them. but it was because i really liked talking to him... he understands the things i've gone through, and he knows what's going on with me, even though i don't say anything... he told me about all his struggles in moving from the philippines to america, teaching me all these lessons that he learned. he made me proud to be his grandson. i only hope that i can make him proud... the least i could do for all the things he's taught me... i feel like sometimes, i take him for granted... i know that he's not gonna live forever... that someday, he's going to go to our Father in heaven. so now i see that i should take full advantage of him being here. so, lolo, thank you for all that you are, and for all that you've done for me.... i promise to make you proud one day, lolo.

"summer days just sittin' around, but when the sun goes down....

I be ready to party...."

this start of break has been.... eventful. first of all, its feels weird not seeing the CHHS crew on the weekdays... no wesley to get crazy/dumb/hyphy/stupid with, no choir second period, no bball in the gym, and no 7th period (pretty damnn bombb class). but i feel this sense of....no achievement. i didn't do as well as i should have this year, and now i'm stressing about it. and it's summer. lamee. i need to step it up senior year... but there's a lot of good things coming up this summer. like the beginning of my recordings! i'll be making a myspace music profile of all you to see. collabo with jordan carreon (aka G22 music) and augie. it's gonna be dope. spread the word. and ask for a dedication if you want one! i might do it. if you're cool enough. =] still looking for a artist name... i might just go with my first and middle name though... it sounds legit. haha. first session tomorrow!

anyways, i also went through a lot the last couple days... i finally talked to her, told her it just wouldn't work out... i just couldn't see us together... i'm sure she'll find someone better than me... and then, there's another girl, "A" (from my last blog?) i was planning on asking her out next week... my chance to sweep her off her feet. =]] i just hope that she won't be thinking of "H" when she's with me... he's acting shady. she shouldn't be talking to him if he's already talking to 2 other girls. i just wanna make her see that she doesn't need that.... she doesn't need him... if you're reading this, "H", then back off her already. you're my homie, but she doesn't need to get hurt by you. and "A", if you're reading this, then i'll make you forget about him... whatever i need to do. you don't need him.

mirrors.

(Ode to the Girl in the Mirror)

"i believe that in a mirror,
you can see into one's soul...."

If you look hard enough,
and believe with all your mind,
you can see all you desire,
things beautiful and fine.

If you looked deep enough,
you become things you can't be,
when i see you, i see an angel
alluring and carefree

You've left an imprint on my heart,
i know that this is true,
for when i look into this mirror,
i only think of you.